fading faith

5:37 PMTuesday, April 29, 2008

lalala. only 1 person can read my blog nw (:
and thts you. XUANHUI-
although my family can read cause same comp =.=
anyw. i wish everyone GOOD LUCK for their exam.
nth much happen.
i wish i could live in a 1 PERSON world.
me, meself and I.
no emotion,
no taking,
no sound...
it will be peaceful...
but i find tht nths gonna change.
i'm hated by them...
why must they hate me so much even when i treat them so gd
I HAVE TRIED MY BEST TO FRIEND YOU.
yet you dont give me chance.
i dont mind if you hate me...
BUT AT LEAST ACT IN FRONT OF ME THT YOU ARE MY FRIEND.
you ignre me..
called me to shut up.
YET YOU WAN ME TO HLP YOU.
nobdy really take me as a friend.
YOU ACT...
all you wanted is just to USE ME.
i nvr had a gd true friends.
NO ONE ENCOURAGE ME.
i wan those friends.
AND I'M STILL WAITING !!

9:39 PMMonday, April 28, 2008

nt gonna post much.
i'm going to change to this to "secret" mode le.
only ppl i find tht cares are allowed.
sorry if you wanna read.
though i dont think gt any ppl reading ><"
lalala.
saw 4 siao girls ==
they are like laughing. laughing. and MORE LAUGHING !!
from the strt of my bus journey to my end, they are like laughing like VERY LOUD.
well. i just post 1 happening...
dont wan to ost much anyway (:
gtg. bye !!

9:16 PMFriday, April 25, 2008

hello ppls :D

i sorry for nt posting for so long ><

VERY BORED && exams are coming up ]:
my test for maths failed..

i knw, i knw.. AWWWWW

i'm DUMBB and thts me ! (:
nvr passed maths :P

well well.. new blogkin, NEW TAGBOARD [:

its all matching :D

exams are coming& i didnt study.

I WAN PASS CANS!! let me pass by nt studying ]:

nth to blog lahs. always no mood to do anything.

friendship is what all ppl need.

without friends, YOUR'E LONELY.

when you're lonely, you EMO.

stop EMO-ing and wake up from this nightmare.

the friends are nt true. nvr be with them.

THE MONSTER IS JUST RIGHT BESIDE YOU. yet you choose to stay.

a pathetic IDOIT! ]:

lost wad i had.

lost wad i wanted.

lost the mood to do anything]:

gimme bck wad i wan..

nthing pleases me nw.

FORGIVE ME FOIR MY ATTITUDE ]:

12:39 PMSaturday, April 19, 2008

hellos ppls

SOMEONE. i'm sorry for misunderstanding you.

i should nt have any doubts abt you [:

but i still wish my wish comes true ><

mummy siao de...

come home only then NAG NAG NAG.

dont wan let her see wad i doing then say wad i doing "SAD TE" i dont noe wads tht either.

she siao de -.- dunno wads wrong with my parents.

then say wad tell my papa then call papa bring to their room.

when they go out thn they lock their room. SIAO ehh

i tink they tink tht i watching porn or smth bahs//

tell papa then i gt jiejie protect me.

papa love jiejie.

mama love me.

mama love papa.

mama tell papa.

jiejie protect me ><

i nvr had a day of care frm them ]':

its always like dat... suan le bahs

nw i wanna cry -.-

*bear-ing*

Anyways, ytd was friday.

its was SPEECH DAY !!

it went well cause we practice alot then its was easy [:

they gt put ALOT ballons for the decor and if you wan, must wait till guest of honor leave.

so i waited..

and waited.

much mre waiting.

and it goes on ><

then junior act 1 deaf person. siao de.

wilbert. AKA, bird bird

blablabla.. miss rahayu scold us for touching the ballons cause the goh nt yet leave ]:

but the fucking ashole band take alot.

they take the ballon and run away then the COs get scolded.

FUCK THEM LAH !! GRR ><

then gt 1 girl wanted the ballon but i thought she was evil.

then i very rude voice talk to her. so guitly ]:

she was like so gd lahs. if only i didnt like scream at her ]:

*sigh* if only we can reverse timing. then i would talk to her nicely ]':

I'M ALWAYS SO FUCKTARD. so jinx ]:

nvr did i do smth right ...

failure.. a BIG FAILURE.

well. meichin also wan the ballon. cause its very nice.

then alot ppl wan but only like 12 of them.

so needa snatch. but 6 taken by band. they still wan take ]:

then i get le but i give meichin cause she very like the ballon..

BUT, i dont like her =/ dont tink the wrong idea :l

but in the end, she ALOT balloon ._."

then she very hard to move ><>

walked to busstop then saw mr yu (music t'cher)

mr yu ask meichin if she can handle. LAWLS !!

so ZUN tht mr yu oso take 38 [: so me, meichin and mr yu went up the bus lo [:

again, so ZUN tht mr yu lived at simei. LAWLS !!!

then ask ask ask where her staybut he say simei simei SIMEI !!

darn it ><

yeapps thts all lahs.

so i go le bahs [:

i dunno if i can ever use comp.

gt a "FIGHT" coming this night .

the prize is the comp.

so gd luck to me!! [:

only if they could care for me.

only if they understand th pressure.

only if they show me more love.

i could be changed. just with love and care ]:

at least 270 days... still waiting

5:55 PMThursday, April 17, 2008

hellos.

i'm still nt feeling gd.

and i'm keeping it...

i noe my mistake.

but i dont wan to realise it.

i dont wan to forget all tht we have have.

BUT if i keep it, i need to bear with all the pain.

all tht i wish is tht we can be tgt AGAIN.

my 1 and only wish tht i am waiting && it can bring my happiness bck.

nth mre. NT SWEETS, nt anyother girls. only you...

and tht SOMEONE, pls use msn and tell me your darling's blog.. thx

if my wish donest come true, i hope you can be happy with tht person.

i wish you would come bck to me..

i'm sorry for the attitude. neither can i control it.

all tht you can say is sorry. but i can say tht, SORRY IS NT GONNA HEAL.

i noe i cannt do anything abt your life.

so.. i wish you a choice of your life. i hope you can think over it.

i dont wanna force you. and i have given my 99% of my hope.

if my tht 1% can come true, i wish it will.

7:59 PMWednesday, April 16, 2008

hi ppls.
I'M NT OKAY...
i'm nt feeling well. *in th heart*
SOMEONE left me. found th other half.
i dunno if i should be happy for that SOMEONE or sad for myself.
all tht i can say is tht. LOVE is a piece of shyt. nth mre to it.
LOVE is like a water cycle.
when you meet at the river/sea/pond, you went up to sky tgt.
after you feel tht you are nt meant for each other... you drp dwn bck and flow bck to another place and ind another person.
WAD IS THIS. you dont betray someone in love.
and tht SOMEONE. i hope you reflect.
&i'm sorry if i misunderstood you...
i dont wanna talk abt this anymore.
it just hurts me...

nth much today.
played basketball with fwens.
i was like training to play basketball. && I'M GETTING BETTER [:
thts a achievement =/
well, went for CCA. blablabla. *learn new song*
didnt have to play cause it was too late to practise tilll my part :D
anyways, i'hv been trying to accept my father.
and i guess he is trying too. thts a gd thing too^^

last thing i wanna ask..
WADS WRONG THT MOST PPL HATES ME.
i dunno wad ppl they are tht they hate me so much.
and ZHENG HAO... i'm nt talking this behind your bck or anything but,
can you pls dont scold ppl when you dunno the truth ?
i'm a fragile boy. you can say me GAY or SISSY but i am EMOTIONAL.
pls get the truth before you scold anyone.

&& ppl who noes me in real life and see me before,
DONT TALK TO ME ABOUT ANYTHING IN MY BLOG DURING SCHOOL HOURS.
except weiting. cause she hlped me alot and took me as a real true friend.
thx weiting. thx alot for there.

7:18 PMTuesday, April 8, 2008

hello ppls
i dunno wad should i talk about.
i found happiness again but just for a short while.
when can i be happy once again ?
i dunno. i dunno i dunno. wad shoud i do ?
i wonder if i had made the right chioce of friends.
the "friends" i know, dont talk to me.
i thought friends should care for each other.
the "friends" i noe care for their true friends.
the COOL ppls. they neglect the IDOITS.
wads wrong with IDOITS. we are humans. why must they divide us?
i wish i can have true friends. THE ONES THT CARE
the ones tht dont even care if i'm a IDOIT.
save my life frm this miserable PIT OF DEATH.
the one tht i must make a chioce.
LET GO OF MY HAND AND DROP TO MY DEATH, or climb bck up.

Angel: he should climb up mahs. die so horrible, die le then no mre hope liaos ]:
Devil : he should just let go. end everything. end his miserable life dudes.
Angel: aiya. he just dont care about other ppl then can liao mah.
Devil : he should climb up. BUT JOIN THE COOL PPLS.
Angel: he climb up le then IGNORE THE TURE IDOITS.
Devil : cool ppl rocks. ppl look highly of them. NOT LIKE THE IDOITS.
Angel: *sighs* me this angel oso dunno should or should nt hlp him.
Devil : JOIN THE COOL PPLS. IGNORE THE IDOITS.

but wad if..
hes nt wanted by bth sides..
anyone wan this PATHETIC IDOIT.
******************************************************************
wad did i do tht deserve this life.
nobody wants me.
the cool ppls ignore me. they look down on me.
the idoits hate me. i dunno where hould i go.
my family hates me. gtg byebye

2:16 PMMonday, April 7, 2008

hell0s :l

well, i'm gonna strt my rubbish.

if you dont like it, SCRAM *and shoo*

Emily, you say my family care but dont show it?

wow, thts because you had smth. (you noe)

but I'M NORMAL. they treat me like a maid D:

i had to do stuffs. WADEVER THEY TELL ME TO DO.

imma cinderella in LIFE. and wad if i dont do it ?
well.. I WILL GET BEATEN UP. THTS CHILD ABUSE !

i dont wan this type of useless crap life ]:

i wan a happy family. i can choose wad i wanna do, wad i wan to have.

i dont wan a family tht treat me as a maid ]:

i feel hurt having this type of family. i look happy happy helping ppl, BUT I'M NT HAPPY.

today star lesson. a presentation.

well.. theres something i wanna share.

A KID hlp ppl but saying tht I WAN TO HLP RAISE FUNDS FOR THE CANCER PPLS.
wow. thts great rite ? and he said this... "Be yourself. dont listen to other ppls"

"if the ppl tht treat you badly and you feel hurt, reverse it"

thts very smart of him rite :D

then guess wad. I FEEL HURT FROM MY PARENTS.

I CANNT REVERSE IT.

I'M GONNA GET BEATEN UP :D

6:42 PMSunday, April 6, 2008

hello ppls :l
i'm BORED :3
why cant i have a family tht cares for me?
why do i have friends tht cares instead of my parents?
i'm nt happy. why dont my parents care?!
i had cough for a verylong time yet they didnt ask me if i wanna see a doc.
wad type of CARE-NESS is tht.
the ignoring care-ness meathod?
Wad i want, i cant get. WHAT I DONT WAN, I STILL DONT HAVE IT.
i dont have wad other ppl have D:
thts the care frm their parents.
Maybe some have it but some dont have it but,
I DONT WAN FREEDOM, all i ask for is care ]:
anyw, enjoy the show..

Angel: Devil,do you have the strange feeling ppls looking at what we're talking?
Devil : erm, YES ?! this the 2nd tym :l
Angel: LOL. wonder why Duncan's so sad sad.
Devil : YOU lahhs :l tell him to wrk for it -.- and stupid ppls call him do your way oso.
Angel: its his chioce mahs..
Devil : YOU FAGGOT. gave him a choice for wad. let him choose my way can le mahs.
Angel: pls dont use vulgarities you BASTARD. shut the FUCK up:l
Devil : lawlls? you call me nt you use then you use. you BBITCH :D
Angel: LOL, ok lahs. we're even :D lets stop using it til we needause it :X
Devil : okok. aiyo, i cannt tahan liao lah!! i have to say it.
Angel: DEVIL, DONT SAY IT ! dont sayyyyyy itttttt
Devil : WE ARE BEING HIRED FROM DUNCAN o.0
Angel: you FAGGOT. say for wad sial. pathetic idoit :l
Devil : we are hired at $50 per sentence we say sial. nice catch rite :D
Angel: still say the price. its company terms&condition sial.
Devil : cannt tahan mahs D:
Angel: lets get on with our thingy lah. waste his money. idoit !
Devil : thts why i'm the devil :D i'm *mant* to do this :l
Angel: lawlls. ok lahs. dont blame you :D
Angel: eh, dunno wad to say sial. talk rubbish ar? o.0
Devil : go to WWW.TALKCOCK.COM - full of rubbish :D
Angel: lawlls. GO BAHS :D i mind tht :/

erm. i tink i'll talk rubbish nxt time. i really no mood to tag real life stuffs le D:

i am so sorry ]: tag me mre often and ppls tht noe me.
pls treat me normally in real life. dont talk t me abt my blog to me kays ?

THX yea :D

4:11 PMThursday, April 3, 2008

hello ppls.
i bored.
i dont like my world.
i dont like anything in this world of mine.
i'hv learnt smth new today in music lesson.
******************************************************
when everything doesnt go your way...
when you wanna hlp ppl but mess up everything...
when you try to make tht person happy, tht person feel more sad,
YOUR'E HOPELESS :D
******************************************************
tht last sentence i put de :l
anyway, it's smthi like dat.
so nw i noe..
I'M HOPELESS.
dont try to do wad u cannt do D:
Do wad you can when you tink its your end.
giving up is a option..
but wad do you get after tht ?
so dont tink of die-ing.
try smth else. TINK BIG :DD

but wad if i cant do anything ?
Angel: Try your best then ?
Devil : why nt take the easy way ? GIVING UP !
Angel: STFU devil.your're pathetic.
Devil : who cares. Just take the easy way and rot in this world of yours :D
Angel: Devil. you rot le dont make ppl rot with you. YOU FAGGOT.
Devil : wadEVER bitch :D why hlp ppl when they treat you this way?
Angel: Duncan, they treat you this way then forgive and forget. let them be.
Devil : They treat you this way, give thDem wad they give you :D its FUN !!
Angel: Duncan, choose your way...

i dont noe wad i am suppose to do. ANYONE SAVE ME ?!
well well. i tink i'll say about my friends. I CANNT BEAR IT ANYMORE.

westly,
YOU SUCK!
u faggot.
YOU MONEYFACE.
YOU DOG
YOU PATHETIC PERSON.

you tink you have roy then you very big meh.
you are just a dog to roy. and you tink you are a great contribution to him.
you moneyface
you always take ppl stuffs like very big like dat.
ppl treat you then you say OK LO. NVM :D
wth sia. idoit.
Weixin oso dont like you.
she dont like your laughter.
you laugh like idoit. laugh until so embarassing.
i hope i dont havr to meet you this type of ppl.
YOU'HV CHANGED ! I HATE YOU. YOU BBITCH !
...................................................................
thanks for all your contribution [:
tag me more pls ppls.
HLP ME CHOOSE MY FATE THX !